I have an iPhone X, and a new iPad. Each has a separate port type, and the iPad didn't come with an adapter. My wife's newest gen iPhone didn't come with an adapter, it had to be purchased separately.

Your wife’s phone came with headphones that didn’t work with her phone?

I don't recall if they came with the standard apple headphones, but she doesn't use those. She has a good pair of Sennheiser earbuds, and so had to buy an adapter separately.

new iPhones come with lightning earpods