I was the born in the 80's, oldest brother of three siblings, mother died when I was 7 and my father didn't remarry until after college. tenecious_tuna's comment sounds very familiar. I wouldn't put too much stock in the "man of the house" phrasing in this case. I'm not so sure it's a male/female distinction, I just felt like I had a different set of worries and responsibilities than my peers growing up. To be fair, it wasn't just me as the oldest. I think my brother and sister shouldered many of the same worries that I did; I was just a few years older than them so I had the older brother experience and the single-parent experience at the same time.

I've certainly seen multiple cases of girls embracing quasi-parental roles in the partial or permanent absence of a mother in the home.

There's no need to invoke gender-wars arguments in this discussion; it's a simple matter of people in families doing what they can to manage difficult situations.