I would have thought the American tipping culture would make most immune to that.

Being on the receiving end of tips when you don't typically get them is odd to say the least.

My wife gives horseback riding lessons; not a job that people typically offer tips for. She's very good at what she does and sometimes a new parent (it's almost always tween girls taking riding lessons) will tip her when they realize how much their kids enjoyed the session. She used to refuse, but after realizing that just made everyone feel awkward, she takes the cash now. However, while she appreciates the gesture, it still makes her feel a little weird.

A simple "thank you, you're awesome" would probably do just as well.

Gauche is a bit of an upper class word, no? Why would upper classes decide to stigmatize handing out cash as gauche?

Oh.

I don't know if you live I the US, but if you just start walking around with five dollar bills and start handing them out, you really don't know what kind of reaction you're going to get. I tried giving my AT&T guy $20 for waiting for me, he wouldn't take it. Perhaps I could have insisted.

Americans can be deeply sensitive to people thinking they're poor and in need of assistance. And five bucks is practically nothing. Most people might well just take it to Starbucks anyway.

> deeply sensitive to people thinking they're poor and in need of assistance

Exactly. A gift card is appreciation. Cash is pity.

I think the common word that would be said aloud, while meaning pity, is charity.

"I don't need/want your charity..." vs "I don't need/want your pity..."

Not to mention, I think I've read that flight attendants are _prohibited_ from receiving cash tips, on pain of termination, non-cash gifts are presumably acceptable (I've heard of quite favorable treatment being lavished on passengers who show up with fresh baked goodies for the cabin crew)

I had a similar experience with the Best Buy Geek Squad. They went above and beyond and I tried to tip $20. The geek squad guy waved his hands, backed up and say "No I can't take that". He said the only thanks he wanted was filling out the survey and my repeat business.

Company policy is probably that they're not allowed to take tips. So accepting it would be a risk. Getting you to fill out the survey and give them good ratings could get them promoted instead of punished.