I also live in the midwest and have a similar plush lifestyle. It's dishonest if you think your arrangement is typical.

Typical for what set of people? I guess all that I really know about is

- stories I read about bay area devs here and

- stories from the people I work with here in my state (there are maybe 5 real tech companies in the state, and I know people at all of them).

Even the people on my team who make lower salaries (say 70k-90k in the midwest), half of them have spouses that don't work and they are doing just fine with kids and enough house to support them all. Compared to this dev who created Babel (and is probably a better dev that anybody on my team), it seems insane.

It sounds like you're not disagreeing with the tradeoffs, you know them well if you live here. So what do you mean is atypical?

It isn't typical for this site, but it is probably typical for a large amount of tech workers who work for non-tech companies. My situation is the same as well. I had no interest in moving to Chicago or a coast and it is amazing how well it works out.

I am paid the same as a remote worker in a suburban area as those who work downtown. The only way to make change is to stop giving into tech companies and VCs wanting to force people into moving to high cost areas. I like to think I do my part when I decline any interview requiring onsite by explicitly stating why I will not accept it.