I'm not making the claim that drunk people are equally fun for a sober person to hang out with as other sober people, which you seem to be responding to - I'm saying the majority of the population would expect there to be alcohol at a party (even the type of upper class New York party described in the linked article).

It sounds like they wanted a hobby meetup group or similar.

> You also have the problem that people get suspicious of people hanging around not drinking alcohol.

Once you're out of college I think this is mostly in your imagination. Nobody will judge you for drinking water or diet soda and you similarly shouldn't judge someone for enjoying a beer at a social event.