You’re repeatedly describing a workplace where people who don’t fit into a narrow set of non-work-related criteria are excluded from significant work decisions, then somehow not realizing that’s the textbook definition of a discriminatory work environment. It’s no different from making important work decisions in the men’s bathroom and saying you won’t hire women because they would feel “alienated”.

Feel free to hang out with your friends at bars, but don’t make them mandatory for work. This principle is not complicated.