The fact that "western feminism" doesn't appear to believe that women have achieved equal rights seems to me like maybe there's some more discussion to be had and changes to be made?

Feminists are still trying to change society and still have a narrative of being about "equal rights" as a concept. They have equality under the law by any reasonable definition. Reproductive health access and family leave laws are the best example I can think of, and even that's a stretch. Do you have better examples?

My impression of the situation is that while the law might confer equal rights, it doesn't result in equal lived experience.

Changing the law is one thing; changing culture and expectations is another.

Of course. Changing the law can grant or deny rights, changing culture and expectations can't.

Then why is there such pushback against the Equal Rights Amendment?