I’m sorry you’re going through so much suffering. I personally don’t think anyone experiencing mental anguish should commit suicide before giving “drugs of abuse” a try. These drugs are so popular and addictive precisely because they’re so good at making you feel better. They’re a last resort, but I think they’re a better last resort than suicide.

Here’s a link to a recent Reddit comment where I discussed this idea, along with suggestions of drugs to try:

https://www.reddit.com/r/depressionregimens/comments/8wcv8f/...