If you're not familiar with the onion, I'd recommend taking a break from whatever important stuff you are doing at the moment and browse around for awhile. You'll find articles like these:

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/scientists_create_largest_novelty_atom

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/itunes_to_sell_your_home_videos

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28660 (No Jennifer Lopez News Today)