It's tough. But life has to go on. My wife of forty years died of cancer last August after two years of treatment. Even though we both knew it would happen sometime we were neither of us prepared for it when it happened. Six months later 'I’m unmanned and unmoored without her' as the other commenter said. Half my memory is gone, I have no one to whom I can make all those scurrilous comments about friends and relations. No one's hand to hold while going for a walk. No one to hold and to touch.

But I have other people who rely on me, my children, my sister, the company I work for. So even though I am in tears as I write this, I know that I have to cope, I have to find a way to be.

It's going to take a while.