Our group is also (super male heavy) but very nice and in a more liberal area. It is a great to get out and be nerdy and give everyone a social thing where everyone has immediate common ground. Age 12-50. It really is cool. Not sure I had much of a point and I had already figured most of this out (we have a niece who is on the spectrum), but.. I didn't realize quite how deep it could go with the practice social things / mask. Being not so great at social things myself I just find it exhausting to do more normal social stuff, but I don't have to practice, I am just an introvert.
But ever since I left, I wonder if I've learned to conceal these behaviours to maintain the life and career I currently have. So the article kind of unnerves me, leaves me wondering I falling into the same mental traps described. Either that, or maybe I've learned to manage by behaviour in a different way. Self knowledge is a fickle thing.
But did they?
I'm living in Sweden. The cultural elite and the whole country behaves like a insecure high-school class where everyone is anxiously watching what everyone else is doing, what's 'right' and what's 'out'.
We are extremely conformist.
The topic of immigration and integration is obvious, but also extreme feminism, environmental issues is on the list.
People even dress the same.
As soon as this behaviour expectation is broken, you'd probably not consider them 'real' friends.
The examples of girls with autism trying to fit in with other girls was sad. I remember in middle school how my nerdy coed friend group got bullied for sitting together at lunch. The guys got called gay and the girls were shunned by other girls. There was a lot of explicit peer group pressure to only associate by gender. Fortunately most people grew out of this by high school.
Personally, I think I tended towards associating with males more often because I enjoyed competitive games (yugioh, magic, etc) and they were more likely to play. I always preferred hobbies with explicit rules to the comparative anarchy of navigating social circles. It's a shame that so many other girls get pressured by family and peers to avoid predominantly male social hobbies. I think they actually help improve self-confidence and create meaningful friendships far more easily for autistic folks than typical sleepovers or gossiping or whatever.