Something I never considered when I was younger was how much these things are a spectrum and that there is no bright dividing line between many of these choices.

As an example: I'm living in what's definitely the suburbs (VA Beach), but within easy walking distance of the local coffee shop, groceries, my kids school, etc.

We don't have an HOA, but know a lot of our neighbors. I have a car, but don't use it much b/c of both location and that I work from home.