Let's say I want to change my mobile plan:

Online form/self-service: a few clicks. Done.

Calling my carrier: explaining what I want, turning down the offer to upgrade to a more expensive plan, hearing about a promotion I'm not interested in, etc...

Or like The Times: No online cancellation, really small telephone service hours, "As per standard industry practice we will charge you an additional month, two if you are cancelling in the last week/two of the billing cycle".

Somehow, though, they managed to stop my service when I cancelled my card.

I was able to down-grade my subscription over email, which isn't as good as an on-line form, but better than a phone-call.

customer service though a website or email "can" be much better than phone.

a recent experience with a plumbing equipment company let me upload photos of my issue. Something I can't do on the phone.

I also don't have to sit there and wait on hold.

"Your tone is quasi-fesicous, but you do not realize that Taco Bell was the only restaurant to survive the franchise wars... Now all restaurants are Taco Bell"

I think Demolition Man was fortelling on several jokes!

What I need is access to 'tier 2' support. Sure, put it behind me following or expressly saying not-applicable to the tier 1 tree. However when I actually /call/ instead of using an automated service I'm already saying: "I have made an informed decision; this requires humans making decisions to resolve."