Spam comes from expectation or the desirability. If neither exist, then yes, it is spam. Also, businesses get spammed a lot too, so I'm not sure what you're getting at there. In fact, businesses are spammed so much most have protocols in place to prevent it, e.g. delisting phone numbers, global internal filters on email, etc.

As for your second example, unsolicited and undesired introductions are spam. I'm shocked that you disagree. If you don't, you won't mind then if I introduce you to a few million of my friends?