This is the issue I face in the area where I grew up and still reside in rural New York. If you read the newspaper editorials it's a constant string of racist and homophobic garbage. I'm approaching 30 and it's very hard to find like minded people here, much less single women with ambitions and who aren't just looking for a baby daddy.

So why haven't I moved? Frankly I'm scared that I can't cut it elsewhere. My job is secure and pays very well for the area (as a single person I make about 160% of the median family income). I could move and work remotely for the same amount which would result in a drastic decrease in quality of life, or try to get another job that I'm probably not qualified for. I've been trying to figure it out for the better part of a decade now.

Where in upstate? You should look up Duncan Crary, who lives in Troy, NY. He did a ton of podcasts with James Howard Kunstler, and has a newer one called a Small American City. It is about this very topic of revitalizing small American cities. There is also Ithaca, NY.

A few days late but I'm way farther north than Troy -- St. Lawrence county. I can check out the podcast, though.

Interview and see what happens. What do you have to lose?