Something that really helped me was getting angry at the companies producing all these foods with added sugar. Seriously, look at the labels, it is EVERYWHERE (at least in the USA). I resolved to not buy these products--why give your money to these companies that can't make a product taste good without resorting to cheap tricks? Why am I paying them to hurt me? I do still buy dark chocolate for dessert a few times a week--I am not opposed to dessert, but that's the only place I think sugar should be.
Ultimately I think everyone has a unique approach (mentally and physically) that works for them, and it's probably an ensemble of smaller strategies accumulated over time that create success in the end. Be willing to experiment (safely), accept temporary failures, learn what works and then repeat all over again.
And no, I think substituting one source of sugar for another is just an expensive way of continuing to eat sugar. If you were trying to get an alcoholic to stop drinking, you wouldn't suggest they switch from cheap wine to "just a glass of Bordeaux before bed", although that sounds like a suggestion they might make :-). You'd suggest they find something else to do that fills the social and metabolic hole the alcohol leaves behind. That's what good cheese has done for me.
And yeah, sometimes I do have something sweet, usually in an unavoidable social situation, but it has been getting easier to stop eating sugar after a relapse each time it happens.
Half a year ago I tried to stop eating all candies suddenly. Was feeling little uncomfortable at times so then I realized it is better not to give your body such shocks. So I decided I would indulge in some sweet curd (and some plain black chocolate) in the afternoons. This worked quite well, I removed 90% of junk from my diet, got to eat more protein and fruits but still got the sugar gratification I needed. Getting rid of so much sugar surprisingly did not hurt as I had imagined. Perhaps drinking lots of water helped as well - it is surprising how refreshing a drink of chilly water can be. Unfortunately, then I got some other health issues, had to revert diet back and am back where I started.
We still enjoy sweet-ish foods but have hugely reduced our sugar intake.
An additional advantage is that as a result our toddler finds most commercial confectionaries which he encounters to be unpaltably sweet, and throws them in the bin after trying them for a few seconds.
It's dopamine. I see it as malware that infected my brainOS and it's more of a stuxnet rather than your typical lame click-n-infect-me.
As for diets, I prefer to set lifestyle goals. For example it doesn't matter on which particular diet I'm on at the moment (I cycle through couple of them every 8-12-16 weeks), what does matter is that I very rarely eat processed food or sugary snacks (once a month at best) and when I do it's _always_ after hard training session and it still _fits my macros_.
These last words are optimistic: " It is not enough to “just say no”—as the 1980s slogan suggested. Instead, you can protect (and heal) yourself from addiction by saying “yes” to other things. Cultivate diverse interests that provide meaning to your life. Understand that your problems usually are transient, and perhaps most importantly, acknowledge that life is not always supposed to be pleasurable."
Since she was born 4 years ago, I cut smoking, soda, potatoes and took a new job for which I bike 20min one way every day, except when it rains heavily.