I'm a little bit more optimistic than you. As noted in the article, there are important differences under the hood between FB in the US and The EU, and these were "pushed through" by courts, and cultural norms (e.g. not a violent/benevolent 'privacy junta' as you suggest).

I can imagine a world where the US gov banned sucking entire contact lists out of people's phones for commercial exploitation, for example. Everyone feels it's creepy, and there's zero user benefit. I don't see why this wouldn't be extremely popular, and straight forward to legislate.

This would remove the primary data collection means for FB's shadow profiles in one stroke.