$500 is still an insane price for a glorified lump of coal.

Compared to the wedding, 500 dollars is nothing.

That would be a significant fraction of our wedding costs. We held ours in our back yard, ordered some catering, served buffet-style, about 50 guests. No DJ, just set up some playlists on Google Music. There's no requirement to blow five figures on a one-day party, just some bizarre social expectation.

Don't over-generalize. I got married for a total price of about $700. One can be frugal if one decides that saving money is a priority.

Not if you get married in Vegas at a chapel with a small handful of family members. It's still a fraction of that cost, but a reasonably-large fraction (maybe 1/10 at most, instead of 1/100).

where does one search the 2nd hand market for these things? I'd be worried I'd be ripped off (granted I worry about that in a jewelry store too).