There are TONS of professional, licensed therapists that can help you with this! Definitely try modern psychotherapy. google "find a therapist" and try the site from psychologytoday.com magazine. Hopefully you live in an area they serve. Most of them do not use meds, and even if they can prescribe them they only go for them as a last resort (some people have such severe anxiety that they cannot even function outside of their house, for instance).
> I suspect professionals are just throwing drugs because they're overwhelmed by the constant wave of misery and depression they're confronted with.
I disagree. I think your medical doctor (rather, anyone's MD) simply doesn't have hours upon hours to listen to your life story and find the perfect formula of lifestyle and attitude changes to help you. A psychologist does, in fact thats (sort of) what therapy is. "sort-of" because therapists generally dont give advice like a sage elder. They do their work by listening to you, reflecting what you're feeling, and letting you discover the problem and solution. I would say try it, and make it clear from the start that you will not take any meds (simply to weed out any therapist who might lead you that way). The only caveat is, every therapist has his/her own style and personality. There is no formula that works for everyone, so try a few sessions (typically one hr/week) and if it's not working for you, try another one until you find someone you can connect with.
Insight is tricky, as is introspection. Other people can offer suggestions and even insight as to what is going on in your head, but they have their own preconceived ideas and patterns they try to fit on you. Ultimately introspection must win, as you are the only one who can actually see what's happening in there. Variations on those suggestions may feel like a better fit - go with what feels most correct, but don't assume you've found "the" answer - I've had several step changes in the accuracy of my understanding of me.
Talk to people who know you, or are related to you, or have their own issues, whatever. You never know what will tip your thoughts into a better understanding of yourself.
I've found it to be true. Understanding where my undesirable behaviors come from is helping me correct them tremendously. It can be a painful process - expect to get worse before you get better - but it can be effective if you're working with the right person. For me the mental picture was less like an onion and more like a tangled knot of yarn, but it is straightening out quite nicely.
I personally don't like the Freudian approach. There are other non-drug based camps.