>For me the issue is with ports. I have exactly zero devices that I can plug into the new fancy USB ports. None of my monitors will connect. I know, they are better, yadda yadda, but I am tired of being held hostage until the "industry" understands how the new ports are better.

Then Apple is not the company for you. They have always been first to obsolete things. Remember the hoopla when they canned the DVD drive? Firewire? Literally every other port that isnt USBC