Re:Loneliness Is a Warning Sign to Be Social
by pmoriarty on Tuesday August 23, 2016 @12:47AM
(#12341465)
Actually, I was thinking more of "real-life" relationships than online ones. Online it's even worse in some ways, as you point out, but better in others, as you can easily find a niche of people interested in whatever obscure thing you might be interested in at the moment -- though whether you can leverage that common interest to a meaningful relationship is quite another story.
As for moving, I've done that many times in my life. I've found that for me, unless I already know somebody in the place I'm moving to, and can meet people through them, I have a very difficult time making new friends. And there's virtually no one I know well anywhere any more.
I think what it ultimately boils down to is not being very social to begin with, combined with some social phobia, with mostly non-mainstream interests, and being content enough with my own company most of the time. That's lead to a lifetime of habits and choices that have resulted in the withering of my friendships the lack of enough motivation to make much effort to get new ones.
Most of the time I don't even think about it, and when I do, I just wonder why I should bother, as my attempts usually lead to nothing or just more pain and suffering.
It doesn't help that the people I'd probably have the most in common with probably aren't very social themselves and have problems making friends too.
As for moving, I've done that many times in my life. I've found that for me, unless I already know somebody in the place I'm moving to, and can meet people through them, I have a very difficult time making new friends. And there's virtually no one I know well anywhere any more.
I think what it ultimately boils down to is not being very social to begin with, combined with some social phobia, with mostly non-mainstream interests, and being content enough with my own company most of the time. That's lead to a lifetime of habits and choices that have resulted in the withering of my friendships the lack of enough motivation to make much effort to get new ones.
Most of the time I don't even think about it, and when I do, I just wonder why I should bother, as my attempts usually lead to nothing or just more pain and suffering.
It doesn't help that the people I'd probably have the most in common with probably aren't very social themselves and have problems making friends too.