News for hackers. Stuff that matters.
Re:Find a new city by refurb on Friday August 05, 2016 @04:55PM (#12235691)
But I've lived where people had different values than me and it just gets exhausting.

Really? I thought diversity was a good thing? I know I wouldn't want to live somewhere where everyone thought the same thing I did. Sounds boring.

Re:Find a new city by tikhonj on Friday August 05, 2016 @07:35PM (#12236374)
The way I read the original comment was that almost everyone held different values. That says nothing about diversity—those different values might be (reading between the lines, are) all more or less the same.

Put another way: it's not a matter of living where "everyone agrees with you" but where "not everyone disagrees with you". Those aren't the same!

Diversity of ideas is definitely a good thing, and, unless you hold fringe views, it means a fair number of people do agree with you. If everyone disagrees with you either you're a real outlier or, more likely, there is less diversity of views on that particular axis.

Re:Find a new city by vertex-four on Friday August 05, 2016 @05:06PM (#12235757)
So here's the thing - diversity of ideas is good, diversity of values is what people struggle with. As long as two people agree on where they're trying to go, they can disagree on the details of how to get there and still be perfectly happy - when either of them gets closer, both do.

But, say you're a gun nut and the people surrounding you are decidedly anti-gun-ownership - there's no shared goal, and no obvious resolution to your differences. If the people surrounding you make progress towards their goal, it goes against yours. There's nothing to do but fight. And fighting is exhausting.

Re:Find a new city by Erik816 on Friday August 05, 2016 @07:13PM (#12236308)
Your example is one of a diversity of ideas. Some people have the idea that guns will keep them safe, others have the idea that guns will just bring on more violence. That is not a difference of values, because you can hold either position while valuing safety.
Re:Find a new city by logfromblammo on Friday August 05, 2016 @05:44PM (#12235924)
Diversity is a good thing. It's what keeps one opinion from forming a supermajority and subsequently browbeating all non-aligned opinions into lonely silence.

For instance, a lot of people around here enjoy football--so many, in fact, that it leads people to assume that everybody likes it. I don't. I think it's a fundamentally flawed sport, and not particularly interesting to watch. But since it's so popular, it's all that anyone ever seems to talk about, especially around the time of the big university rivalry game.

After the last pro game in February, I breathe a sigh of relief, thinking it's done until late summer, and maybe the sportos will turn to baseball or soccer or volleyball or lacrosse or water polo as a topic of conversation. Nope. Let's instead immediately speculate on next football season.

Do other sports even exist around here? Can we talk about both Team Whyachi bots getting knocked out of the Battlebots tournament early? Maybe talk about non-Democrat and non-Republican political issues? Maybe you've read a book lately? No? All you know is football? Oh, great; you can also talk about how you go to your conservative Protestant Christian church more than once in any given week.

This is why the spouse and I actually got excited to see a guy with visible piercings and tattoos. And to hear two lesbians with hideously thick Bostonian accents celebrate at a game. It's even sort of interesting to hear grown-ass adults talk about catching Pokemon. When everyone is the same, doing and saying the same thing, it is so tediously boring that it hurts. That is exhausting.

Re:Find a new city by madgar on Friday August 05, 2016 @06:23PM (#12236112)
What does any of all that have to do with values?
Re:Find a new city by logfromblammo on Monday August 08, 2016 @10:41AM (#12248133)
It's just the most insignificant example of how being even slightly outside the local cultural norms can grate on your psyche. If I can get irritated at how people around here are football obsessed, anything more significant must have a greater impact.

So if people around here are generally hostile towards homosexuality, a gay person must feel worse than I do when people start talking about specific players on specific teams and upcoming scheduled games and the keystone play of some past game and just shut up, shut up, will you please shut the hell up about football for once?!

It makes me wonder how people even further from the norm than myself can even find the strength to get up out of bed in the morning, or, once risen, get through the entire day without destroying some ignorant blatherer with a beam of pure rage exploding from their foreheads.

It's not just about being around people who are different, but having enough different people around you that you can't just assume everyone else is like you. If you don't know that someone is Muslim, and make a derogatory comment about Muslims in front of them, that person might not feel secure enough socially to confront you about it. So they keep their religion secret from you, and you might continue crapping on something important to them, without anyone ever telling you that you shouldn't do that.

If, on the other hand, you live in a city where anybody could be anything, you are more likely to encounter situations where you are the minority in some way, and therefore will probably be more sensitive to how it feels when a local majority tramples over your opinions.

You just have to realize that other people might not share your opinions, interests, and values, and if yours are part of the local majority, other people might just be humoring you to fit in better, or irritated at the constant reminders that they are not part of the dominant tribe.