There is a difference between "what you're doing is so altruistic" and "what you're doing is because of altruism". I don't object to the former---I can totally appreciate how that makes sense as an observation about the world and the people around you. I do object to the latter, especially when it's used as a way to bin every programmer's motivation for writing code and then derive a political point from that binning ("open source is unsustainable").

I don't think to myself, "I can't wait to get home from work and selflessly help others!" I think to myself, "I can't wait to get home from work and crack open that really interesting problem that I've only been able to give a third of my brain to today." If the fruits of the latter result in someone else saying it's altruistic---that's cool. But don't try to tell me I'm doing it because it's altruistic. I'm not. (Being called altruistic is kind of funny. It's either a wonderful compliment or a condescending snub of youth/naivete. In my experience, anyway.)

FWIW, I suspect we're on the same page. I'm just trying to clarify the point I was trying to make to the original parent, because I think that's getting lost.

Your conception of 'self' is not inherently limited to your individual being.