That's not correct, but is a common misunderstanding. The Catholic Church's teaching is that sexual intimacy between spouses has both unitive and procreative dimensions, and that both need to be respected.

For a deep dive, see Pope St. John Paul II's Theology of the Body[1] and the late Fr. Paul Quay's The Christian Meaning of Human Sexuality[2].

[1] https://www.ewtn.com/library/PAPALDOC/JP2TBIND.HTM

[2] http://j.mp/QuayMeaningOfSexPDFscan

That's very interesting. It may indeed be incorrect but it is what my priest taught, it is what my teacher at Catholic school taught, and it is what the retreat I had to go on to get married in the church taught.

What does that retreat mean? What happens there? Sorry, never heard of such a thing so i'm curious.

A retreat is, generally speaking, a day or series of days (anywhere from 2 to 30+) during which one spends the majority of one's waking hours praying, reflecting silently, listening to presentations on some topic/s and/or attending workshops (which form the basis of one's reflections), and possibly engaging in one-on-one or group discussions (depends on the retreat's format, some entail silence throughout).

To lessen distractions from the cares of daily life, retreats are usually conducted away from one's domicile in some peaceful setting (mountains, coast, etc.), at a "retreat center" or some facility that provides sleeping quarters, bathrooms, meeting space, and a refectory. To make the whole exercise cost-efficient, a retreat is usually conducted for a small to medium-sized group, rather than for just one or two participants.

In the context of religious institutions, it is a fairly common practice to organize retreats for persons who are finalizing their preparations for a change in state of life, e.g. going from single to married, lay person to ordained, student to graduate, etc. The topics addressed at such retreats usually pertain to that change, with an aim to help participants better prepare internally for the obligations and challenges ahead.

Thank you for that explanation. I was surprised I did not hear from it as I was raised in a strict religious community[0] and never heard about this.

[0] Not sure what it would be called in the US but something very strictly Christian where you cannot do anything on sunday, not only not work, but also not drive cars etc and in are not allowed to have (own or use) TVs, radio's, computers and have special schools schools which teach them this kind of thing. Thinking (yes thinking), at any moment, about anything that is not allowed, will land you in hell. The ordeal made me an atheist at a young age, but I remember the teachings well.

Thank you, that was a better answer than the one I was able to come up with.

You go to a retreat center for a weekend (usually somewhere secluded, in the woods, on an island, a mountain, etc) with a bunch of other couple who are also getting married and you talk about faith and marriage. It usually involves faith and team building. Some churches will let you get away with night classes but the retreat is usually over in a weekend vs the class that takes longer.

Thing is, I'm not particularly religion and neither is my wife, but our family insisted we get married in a Catholic church so we had to go through with it. So I opted for the retreat because it got it over and done with in a weekend.

>Most likely having sex with a prostitute is not your spouse

That's my point. Christianity has long been very pro-sex, just with your spouse. As I said, you could be sued for not having sex with your spouse.

>Also, as someone who was raised Catholic it was very clear. If you're not doing it to procreate you are sinning.

That is totally incorrect. You aren't allowed to prevent conception, you need to "let god decide". But there's nothing suggesting the purpose of sex must be procreation. Again, there's a spiritual and emotional side of sex that is seen as vital.

That's a little bit of a technically. Saying you have to go all the way, so to speak, and you can't do anything to prevent it is the same as saying it has to be for that purpose. As a mental exercise, say every time you had sex you had to pull the trigger on a revolver that has a bullet in only one barrel. Sure there is a 5/6 chance you will be fine but who in their right mind would take that?

Someone can say it has an emotional aspect all they want (and they do, and it's true) but that doesn't stop the other part from being true too.

Note: I have a child and I love her more than anything. Buy saying you can't do anything to prevent pregnancy and saying the only way you can have sex if there is a chance you procreate is the same thing (unless your physically incapable).

>Saying you have to go all the way, so to speak, and you can't do anything to prevent it is the same as saying it has to be for that purpose.

No it is not. At all. Saying you can't barf up your food after you eat it is not the same as saying you can only eat solely for the purpose of nourishment. You can still eat for taste and pleasure. You just can't prevent yourself from getting the nourishment that goes with it.

>Buy saying you can't do anything to prevent pregnancy and saying the only way you can have sex if there is a chance you procreate is the same thing

Which has nothing to do with the subject. You are confusing intent with outcome.

I'm going to have to back away from this discussion. There is definitely more I can say but you and I are clearly on different pages and I do not wish to color my Hacker News account with a religious debate. Unless it is vim vs emacs :)