When I was in college, I took my girlfriend on a summer vacation. We were both broke, so we decided to camp out along the CA coast. My car was on its last days, and the transmission didn't feel right, but we wanted that vacation. She was a great sport, as I tried to make it work.

It seemed like nothing was working as I planned, except the sight of her in that bikini. I had a bunch of camping equipment, and thought, "Ahh--this will be a breeze. I'll just pitch a tent when the sun goes down. First night--ticket. (The state parks, private parks are completely filled months in advance by smart travelers. I had no idea they were so popular.)

Second night--I ended up in Hotel California. I believe in Santa Barbara. The hotel was horrid, but it looked nice from the outside.

There she was this beautiful, innocent blond, sitting on the edge of the bed. She said, "Well--at least we won't get hassled by the cops?". I went to get dinner, and even bought a candle. This was our first vacation together, and nothing worked out.

Out of feeling bad about the room, I told her a lie. A lie over Chinese food, and the candle.

I told her this is where the musicians stayed when they wrote that song--Hotel California. The look on her face was priceless. I was in too deep, and couldn't tell her the truth.

I remember limping my Chevy back home. I still can't get her out of my mind though. I remember she wore a bikini, and wondered why people were looking. Yes--she was that innocent. We went shopping, and I bought her a one piece bathing suit. I told her this is the fashion here. I lied again. I have no idea what she saw in me.

Dude, you left her at the Hotel California so you could escape?

I can see the conversation now in that Hotel in Santa Barbara:

Clerk: Sorry. You can never leave.

You: Can't you take the blond?

Clerk: Only if you buy her a one piece.

You: Which piece? She already has two.

Clerk: A one piece, it's the style around here.

You: Ok ok...

Apropos of nothing, another song about the music industry sucking is Man of Constant Sorrow by the Soggy Bottom Boys.

Edit: The people modding you down are just jealous.

Man of Constant Sorrow is almost certainly not about the music industry. Its roots haven't been definitvely traced but many people think it was a Celtic folk song.

Was that perhaps the Mandalay Beach resort in Oxnard? It's not the Hotel California but as you noted, it would do in a pinch.

Funny. Indeed, the song is not about the recording industry, but about (loosing) innocence (I think).

You've lived a good life, mate.

I aspire to fiction that reads like that.