I think it's interesting you're describing values systems in terms of particular jobs. Like, I work as a writer, and I do value the work that I do, but I don't think of that as my values - my values are: sound, well-researched information; kindness; humor; creativity; taking care of important resources; starting good conversations... It is difficult to believe that any of those values are "deeply offensive"to anyone - and if a person finds them offensive, I do want to change that person's mind. I agree that values are often associated with a community, but i think the work of speaking across community lines to find common values is deeply important - particularly in a far-flung democracy. In your Sanders vs. Trump example, I think actually a lot of the underlying values are the same - dignity for workers, safety for families... if we were all better at speaking about our underlying values, we would have an easier time understanding each other.

Devil is always in the details. At a high level, we're all human, and we all want life, liberty, connection, meaning, and the pursuit of happiness. It's just that means very different things for different people, and as folks get older, they tend to define meaning for themselves in ever more specific terms. The more specific you get, the more likely your definition will come into conflict with anothers'.

I don't much socialize with the people I work with. The people I do socialize with are not from within my industry.