oleander73

I was quite ready to die (after stage 4 dx), but I thought "What the heck, let's give it a go. I've always been curious what it is like." It turned out to be much less horrible than I expected and nearly five years later I'm still alive.

I thought the same, until I got cancer (stage 4 even, so the chemo wasn't curative). I don't know if I was lucky or it was the type of chemo, but it wasn't nearly as bad as I expected. It's been nearly five years since diagnosis and I'm very happy I got treatment. Considering the fact that I have incurable cancer, my life is spectacularly good!

My "secrets" are motivation and time. I was very motivated to change my diet and changed my life to make sure I had the time (and energy) to cook a real meal every day. I also treated it (almost obsessively) as a quest to improve my cooking skills (and probably taste too) to use as little processed additives as possible. On average I eat more than 500 gram of vegetables a day now and really enjoy it. Edit: I also only drink water and one cup of decaf coffee with almond milk a day.

I'm not considered terminally ill yet by most "official" definitions (you have to have months to live). I'm lucky to have a cancer that so far response to treatment to slow it down substantially. This is relevant to the discussion because it means I'm more or less in the same position as the non-terminally ill people you are talking about. In my locale there are euthanasia laws, but they require that I suffer unbearably before euthanasia is allowed. I do not like this prospect one bit. I'd much rather die before reaching that phase. So the reality is that people's discomfort with death will potentially cause me great suffering. This makes this discussion very personal to me. Even though it might seem to you my situation is substantially different.

It is horrible if people are forced into MAID because of monetary issues, but that should obviously be addressed by improving their financial support, not by taking away the option of MAID.

I have incurable cancer and I'd really like to die on my own terms. Why should that be hard? Today it is still way too hard in most of the world (including in countries that have MAID). Also, it's not just about it being "hard". Sure I could blow my brains out, but I'd like to have the option to die with my loved ones by my side without traumatizing them (or getting them in potential legal problems).

A contradictio in terminis.

I'm retired. I live in a country where healthcare costs aren't an issue and have enough savings to live on for my projected lifespan.

I think partially out of habit and every now and then there's something really interesting that reinforces the habit :-)

(Not trying to score sympathy points) I got diagnosed with metastatic cancer (incurable). Five weeks later (while getting chemo) I quit my job. I was a workaholic software developer. I haven't programmed since. Best decision I ever made and I'm happy and enjoy life (with some limitations).

In my (unpopular) opinion trials for people with incurable cancer are quite predatory. You are supposed to participate to help science, not yourself. But in reality many people desperately cling to anything that gives them hope.

Agreed (except the part about the patient paying for clinical trials). After I got diagnosed with metastatic prostate cancer last year I was asked to participate in a immunotherapy trial. I declined as a wasn't about to spend the next two years (that could very well be my last) going to the hospital every three weeks to be poked and prodded.

I have incurable cancer and let me tell you, talking about curing death is laughably absurd at this point. We don't even have good pain killers.

I have incurable cancer and I wish I had the option of going to the vet to "move to a farm upstate."

Thank you for your kind reply. I'm actually doing pretty good. I'm not currently in pain and plan to die before I am.

I figured out a good way to end my life myself should my euthanasia request be denied.

I've always been a proponent of the right to die when you wish and my current situation has given me more time to think about this and made me empathize even more with people who want to die for whatever reason. I too try to spend a portion of my time to fight for this important freedom.

Agreed. Although I do believe you have a moral obligation to attempt to make the people who care about you understand your thought process and ideally agree with your decision.

The psyche test would be great. That way anyone who wants to die only has to take the test.

One of the rules is that two independent doctors need to be sure that you want to be euthanized, so this is already covered and has nothing to do with the ridiculous judgment of whether I am suffering enough.

It's definitely complicated, but in two countries the courts have already ruled that the ban on assistance violates the European Convention on Human Rights.

If the people that remain behind are at peace with the decision it doesn't really matter 'what might have been'.

Also, taking away the 'easy' option means that a large number of people will do it in a way that is more gruesome and much harder for the people left behind.

I don't know if you're being serious or not, but this is actually a profound point that a lot of people don't seem to grasp (maybe because they don't really believe in death being final).

If you take this point seriously then it follows that there is only one important thing to do before you choose to die: Make sure your friends and family understand your choice and can live with it.

There are actually a number of countries (and US states) that now have euthanasia laws. We got there first, but that also means we didn't get to learn from anyone. There are certainly problems with the Dutch laws, but there is no political will to change it, because it works 'well enough'.

I've extensively studied the Dutch euthanasia law and practice and think I know the right things to say to convince the doctor, but it really shouldn't have to be that hard.

It is, but there are complications. My parents are still alive and I'd like them to be present (and they'd like to be present), but when you are present at a suicide you automatically become suspected of 'assisting' and that is not something I want them to have to go through when they are mourning.

As someone for whom this is a real life practical issue, not some idle philosophizing, even asking the question is repugnant to me. I have incurable cancer and at some point I will decide "enough is enough" and I'd like to be euthanized by a doctor. The doctor will then have to decide if my suffering is sufficiently unbearable and only if he comes to that conclusion is he allowed to do it. He'll have to justify his judgment to a committee and if they disagree he can (theoretically) be prosecuted for murder. This is insane and caused by assholes who believe human life is sacred or some such bullshit. (I'm in The Netherlands.)

The "things not to say" list is pretty good, but I strongly disagree with the "things to say" list. I appreciate it when people say "let me know if I can help", but offering specific help or even worse "helping" without asking just drains my energy. I've also noticed I like getting a postcard, but dislike getting a text message. A text message produces a desire to respond (which I often don't feel like) whereas a postcard can just be enjoyed without the need to reciprocate. Although I did send flowers to someone who sent me six postcards in as many months.

Same. I really enjoying sleeping (i.e. being unconscious) and being dead would be the same.

Agreed. I have incurable cancer and I very much plan to die pleasantly. The cost of that is that I will probably die much sooner than necessary, but I can live with that.

You should at the very least investigate the effectiveness and risks of resuscitation. I only got a DNR after being diagnosed with incurable cancer, but had I known the (in)effectiveness and risks of resuscitation I would have done it much earlier.

The sad truth is that we don't have any good painkillers. Current painkillers are either weak or have strong side effects. Source: I have incurable cancer (not yet in any pain) and did a lot of research on every aspect of it (including future pain management.)

Prostate cancer. No, I have limited faith in medical science and none whatsoever in alternatives. Like I said, I'm quite happy and don't cling to life. I'll enjoy whatever time I have left to the max, but there's no need for me to maximize my time on earth (i.e. quality over quantity).