genderbar

I get your point, but I think the problem is with in-group behaviour. You are comfortable with swearing if you're very comfortable with the group dynamic.

But there are plenty of out-groups in technology along plenty of lines, who may privately be uncomfortable in this situation; and gender is only one of those lines.

If we pretend there is no problem with gender that needs addressing in this respect, it's not that we are excluding women: it's that we are excluding every aspect of diversity in technology.

Get back to me after someone you don't like or don't trust throws you some of that spice.

Profanity is (deliberately) uncomfortable to people who are not part of your in-group. Women are more likely to be/feel excluded from in-groups in technology workplaces.