egoodberry

If you're designing sites yourself, I completely agree with you. I haven't much of an eye for design myself and always rely on foundational CSS to take care of these kinds of decisions when I build pet projects; however, I've always worked on teams that have designers who hand me high-fidelity mocks (or at least high-level style guides) that answer these questions. The implementation itself is simple enough once you've worked with CSS long enough.

"i'm sorry but CSS just isn't fun to have to write from scratch"

That may be your problem. Maybe I'm a glutton for punishment, but I especially enjoy this type of work.

In my experience, the fighting comes in when the designer (who generally has less understanding of the Bootstrap modules' intended roles) extends an existing UI concept that came out of the box. This is a perfectly reasonable ask on their part- it's a component on our site, why shouldn't we be able to customize it?

A specific example: Bootstrap expects dropdowns to be unordered lists with anchors as the top-level element, so having a fixed-position header as the first item while its children scroll is difficult. If this has been our CSS based on our markup, it would've taken fifteen minutes, because we could have gone in and done a bit of basic surgery on our module, making it more flexible. (This may not be the best example, but that's the general idea.)

An even lighter-weight alternative: forgetting about CSS "frameworks" altogether. Aside from propping up prototypes really quickly (an exercise made trivial with these help of these little style collections) I just don't understand why anyone would want them in a real app. I've spent hours upon hours fighting the likes of Bootstrap and its copycats. And to what end?